If Bart Simpson and Milhouse Van Houten had made up this story in Barts tree house I would've been disappointed by the end result. For this to be made be real human beings that actually got paid makes me shake my head in sorrow. The movies only saving grace is the scenery, which you soon realise was used before in the fellowship as our heroes walk along on their quest, (not New Zealand) but still beautiful. As the movie continues you can see time and time again where they have taken parts of other movies, I kid you not, from king Arthur, Centurion, The Eagle even close to an imitation of colonel Kutz from Apocalypse now.
Our heroes set out on their quest with 4 horses which had to be returned to Blackpool beach after the 8 hours of hire had expired. So it's then on foot and into battle. The battle scenes reminded me of children playing toy fights, hiding behind trees before jumping out on their friends and rolling around in the grass laughing, while our combatants were swinging away with swords others were in the background doing the actions of the Joker, and the Penguins henchmen, moving their arms about but not knowing why. I kept waiting for a big KER-POW, BIFF or KER-SPLAT sign to come on the screen, but alas that never happened. At my lowest point of depression a lady's * came on screen that took my mind from the dullness of this horrendous movie, but then the same lady had her breast on the screen a lot more times than needed to be. The ending was a mixture between Conan and Riddick, while the end scene was a Braveheart rip-off. I understand that children write silly stories, but please do not put them on the big screen, think of our sanity!
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